I've signed up for help_nz here.

They won't be long fic(s) but I'm willing to negotiate depending on how high the bidding goes.

( my offering )

Yes - this includes HP. Yes, this includes expansions on anything that I've previously written (including that awful abandoned WIP that shall go unnamed).

You have until Monday night at midnight (I'm assuming EST) to get your bids in.

Err, long time, no post personal stuff, eh? Bet some of you haven't missed the kvetching about work at all *winks*.

Work continues. We hired a new person who seemed rather brilliant and, instead of that brilliance, have got the woman asking "is that the fax machine?" every time the fucking thing rings. She also can't remember who anyone is, gets extremely defensive and cunty about it when you remind her who the person is and, to put it mildly, is a fucking moron. She deleted all of September's work off the September tab, put in October's numbers and then asked how she goes about creating a tab for October. After she'd already put the information in and got rid of the September. Yes, the boggle deserves repeating. And then she got really defensive and bitchy and argumentative when I asked her to fix the information and put September back in place. The worst bit is that she hasn't picked up a single thing and still asks the same dumbass questions day in and day out when she has a fucking manual right in front of her!

My workload has only increased since she's been here over two weeks ago.

I'm now at 6 weeks of covering two positions. I'm strained and stressed and ready to snap something rather regrettable at the moron. It's to the point that my favorite coworker, who has the patience of a saint, wants her gone so bad that she's not even helping anymore. Hopefully, she's gone soon.

I've got buttloads of fic to repost into my own lj for archiving purposes. I also sent off the first couple of posts from my Star Trek Big Bang attempt to beta. elanorofcastile and I will be posting bits and pieces.

My birthday is coming up in less than two weeks. A few of you asked what I might want this year. I do not want any LJ gifts. It's still my little boycott from Strikethrough. Instead, I'd appreciate...( mah birfday wishes )

I nominated the following fandoms for Yuletide:

Boondock Saints
Brent Weeks - Night Angel Series
The Departed
Four Brothers (movie)
Green Street Hooligans

Go forth and nominate your own and, if you have an extra space, add in that Brent Weeks book series, plz. It needs the loving. I had to do the first nomination for it. In fact, go out, buy the books and devour them and then write for the fandom, too, if I can get all greedy.

My nephews are coming to visit this weekend. We're going to go pick apples at an orchard near Willcox. My SIL thought that it would be great fun for all of us to then drive up to their house in Phoenix for me to spend the third birthday in a row getting ignored by my brother and his family while we celebrate Halloween a week early for the nephews. Um, no thanks. This year, I'd like to make my birthday about me, mkthx. I'm taking off for the Thursday before through the Tuesday following. I have nothing planned by writing fic, sleeping, painting a room in my house, writing and sleeping. Oh and did I mention sleeping? And the writing?

I was going to post a rant about the disorganization at the Harkins in Tempe but, instead, I'm going to stick with the gleeful bits. Not only did Larry McMurtry stop by my office today (he bought a bunch of used books and is helping to price the ones that he didn't buy) but my old neighbor from when I lived in Camp Hill, PA, stopped by today. She drove in from Camp Hill! Alas, I twisted my ankle at work and couldn't make it to Fry's tonight. Someday, we will get our porch stairs fixed at my office. Someday *impotently shakes fist*

Another awesome thing that happened is that someone read an old H/D fic of mine that I'd forgotten that I'd written. Upon reading it when it showed up in my inbox, I thought it sort of stood up, still. I look back to my older works and I get mildly embarrassed by some of them. Others, I think stand up. Coffee is the story, written back in March of 2006. What do you guys think? Does it stand up?

Also - I noticed that I failed at responding to comments on that post (and so many others, omg. So sorry, people) so major apologies to everyone that commented on it. I appreciate them even if I'm now far too embarrassed to respond to them. (I'm looking at you, yodels, sugareey, enchanted_jae and wearethestars in specific.) Oh man, how much has happened in fandom since then?

3 years ago today, I posted a hd_365 fic (don't read it. It's not very good). I posted a Donald Duck Impression to cheer a flist member. (omg, lol. SRS LULZ) I'd forgotten about that one. (I unflocked it so you can giggle at my horrible impression) Also - I giggled in it. LOL. and wtf. I have a tag for it? What the everlasting fuckity fuck? And then I posted about going to Coachella.

Now I'm all nostalgic for the fandom of old.

ETA: omg. I did the donald duck impression TWICE. here too. OMG. Also - that transcript is so made of win, incapricious!

I want to get all het up about Amazon's latest round of failure. I'd like to claim that I'm boycotting them for that reason but I'm not. See, Amazon has been full of fail for a very long time. Ask Reba Belle - a former Amazon user who was suspended for having the audacity to review a book and give it three stars and then *gasp* protest having all her personal information outted by the author of the book she reviewed.

Amazon fail? Totally and completely expected. Only surprising bit is that it took them this long to fail on this scope. I hope that the boycott continues even after they "fix their computer glitch".

In other news, I missed most of the Amazon fail is because of gryffindor_j. She's a horrible enabler. Srsly. She's awful. Why? Let me tell you. I've been mainlining Heroes all weekend. I got through all of Season 1 (omg, seven disks, wtf). I had to make a couple special trips to blockbuster to replace disk 4 because that stupid thing was broken 3 times. THREE FUCKING TIMES. Then, after finally conquering Disk 4 of Season 1, I got through 50% of Season 2. Someone have a link where I can dl the other half of Season 2? I got through Disks 1&2. I need disks 3&4. Also - Season three? Where is the actual show at? Season 4?

( personal reactions so far )

In summation - anyone got any recs for Matt/Mohinder and/or Hiro/Ando?

Today is the last day of my trip and, unfortunately, my last day off in the next three weeks. Yes, that means I'm working Saturdays and Sundays for the next three weeks. Have I mentioned lately what a moron my boss is and how much I hate my job?

I just applied for three more jobs at the University.

I met up with star98hope yesterday and omg. She is awesome :D. We laughed and gossiped about work and fandom and we even discussed the evil and non-working Ron!cock.

Then, when she unfortunately needed to head back to work, I headed out to the FDR Memorial and wrote for like 3 hours. I had a scene that wasn't working in my head and I fixededededed it there next to the waterfall while staring at an amazing quotation about social justice.

Icee (janicechess for those that don't remember my crazy nicknames) is evil. She not only got her husband interested in Bleach but I was forced to watch a few episodes. I was all for just watching but then she said the fated words "Renji has tattoos. They go all the way down his back." and I was hooked on Renji. Not so much hooked on the anime or anything but oooh, Renji's tattoos are pretty.

I kind of sort of have a date when I get back in Tucson. I've been borrowing a lot of books from the library and the one librarian is really cute in a nerdygeekylibrarian sort of way. So we were going to go out for dinner but I was travelling so he called me yesterday while I was at the FDR and we talked for about 30 minutes, reconfirming dinner plans. So yayes for date-age.

Off to pack to get to the airport at 3. Icee very kindly is coming to pick me up and take me to the Metro so I don't have to haul my heavy bags 1.5 miles to the Metro. She really really is the bestest. I sort of want to hide under the covers and pretend that she can't see me so I never have to leave and go back to work ever again.

Also - last trip until a certain braintwin (who secretly loves my mocking of the Xena) comes to visit. Travelling only reminds me how much I hate my job :/.

I've been promising links to a few of my favourite GLBT books.

The first is Kirith Kirin. I reviewed it before and it maintains a very high spot on my favourite book list. A small caveat - I would not read the continuation of the series. It devolves into a weird world that I didn't enjoy.

Lynn Flewelling. No, srsly. She has two series - Nightrunner series feature a gay couple as the two main heroes. Every book (but the last one which I hated) is well written. I have high hopes for the next book as the author took the concrit and worked on the issues and promised to improve the issues. So give this series a try.

The second series is Tamir Trilogy features a transgendered heroine. It's a fantastic concept and it's fairly well executed. I quite like this series.

So there are some of my favourite books. Do you have any recommendations?

Finally, a few more fandom things - I've been promising a link to this story - Why Sex Ed Should Stay in Schools - it's a Sesame Street slash story and omg. The lulz. I talked about this at Terminus a lot. I've talked about this story in chats and on vacation and just go read it. It's seriously amazingly crackalicious.

Verbotene Liebe playlist. Srsly awesome in a semi-poorly-acted German and subtitled sort of way.

Went to the local community college and took my placement exams. Surprise surprise, I got perfect scores. (Can I use this as beta certification that I edited four essays properly?) In fact, due to my high scores, I tested into the honors program there which, yanno, is a waste as I'm only taking one class there.

Am signed up for my intro to international relations class and will be starting it in a couple of weeks. So, it was a productive day, even if I didn't get any writing done at all.

Speaking of writing - I was tagged for that Five Favourite Fics I've written meme. So, here goes -

WRITER'S MEME: Sometimes it's ok to pimp yourself out. Post a list of the top five favorite fics you've written, regardless of fandom or the reason you love them. This isn't about the BEST things you've written, but what you LOVE most. Then tag five other people to do the same. (I don't do well at tagging so no one is tagged)

Moments - (Harry/Draco) It's got a disparate timeline, darkness, an interesting ending and explores various themes. I adore this story though it wasn't well received. I wrote it when I was extremely happy, which makes it a bit boggling that it came out the way it did. I don't think it's the best thing I've ever written but I do love it.

Deprecor - (Harry/Draco) When I started writing this story, it was a complete and total PWP. I never meant it to have any sort of theme or moral or anything at all other than BDSM. I love exploring the lifestyle. Hell, I used to live that lifestyle for awhile. To see it evolve into something unexpected and well-received made me extremely happy. Some authors hate that but I love when stories do that.

Moments in Memory - (Neville/Ginny) I wrote this for hp_springsmut and omg, so much research and pushing of the self on this one. I wrote this for coffee_n_cocoa and I angsted over it like you wouldn't believe. Hello, writing Neville for the most fantastic Neville writer ever? Yeah, stressful. I have such a brilliant support network of friends that listen to my wibbling, slap me upside the head and then make me go with the ideas. So, not only am I proud of this story and think that it holds up even now, it reminds me of my friends and the way they listened to my ideas and my flailing and reassured me/kicked my ass/helped me.

This next one - I'm going to cheat on by doing two separate stories as one. Last August, I had two Deamus prompts. I angsted over both. The first was what became Root So Deep and the second became Wish Long and Long. My justification of these two being combined into one is that the writing experience, timeline and the posting date meld into one. I remember when I saw the list of who had made it into smutmas and I looked at that list and prayed for kaalee. When I got her, I bit my hand to keep from crying and I knew, absolutely knew, the story I wanted to tell. It was completely crystal clear in my head. The same is true of Wish Long and Long. Both stories were there and completely begging to be told. I stayed up long through the night writing both of these stories. I'm truly proud of them for a variety of reasons. The first is that they turned out fantastic and that's not just ego speaking. The second is that they turned out exactly as I envisioned from the beginning. The third is that I wrote them for people I love. The fourth is that network of support I just talked about. My friends organised group chats JUST to cheer me on and reassure me. People that don't read HP or Deamus or slash or even fanfiction, read over them and helped me. I'm getting maudlin but these stories proved to me that fandom is a community.

Finally - This list wouldn't be complete without One Last Fare. This was my first piece of fanfiction in Harry Potter. It doesn't quite hold up to the new writing style and skill level but I'm still inordinately pround of this and I adore it. I was so scared when I linked it to the first community here on LJ. OMG, soooo scared that people would hate it and tell me so. Then people responded to it and were so gracious. I love that this story launched me into this crazy community known as fandom.

So there you have it. My five favourite fics that I've written. They're not all the best in the world but I do love them muchly. I'll admit that I haven't lost that small flutter when I hit post and I wait, anxiously, to see what people are going to think of my latest creation. I don't think that ever goes away, no matter where you are in the food chain of fandom or writing.

This has been brewing for a bit... I'll try to stay polite but...

I belong to a shitload of comms. Maybe not as many as some but there are lots. Sometimes there are fic searches in those comms. I don't mind them if the searcher isn't spamming every frikken comm related to that pairing at the same time.

In fact, sometimes I re-discover old favourites, discover new favourites and sporking material and, I'll admit it, I've had an ego boost or two when one of my stories was searched for.

What I hate are the posts from people bitching about fic searches. I especially hate when people are all "ZOMG if you don't stop the fic searches, I'm going to leave this comm!!1!1!oneoneone".

Get. The. Fuck. Over. Yourself.

At least a fic search promotes discussion and allows for people to find something new to (re)read. You (and this is a general you) pissing and moaning about the fic searches does nothing but promote wank.

Scroll past 'em. Leave the comm. Piss and moan in your own journal about fic searches. I don't much care. Keep it out of the comm and stop making lurkers/newbies/others feel guilty about enjoying a story enough to want to read it again.

I do realise the hypocrisy of my post as I'm bitching about people bitching about fic searches but it never fails to annoy me. But at least I'm only annoying my flist and following my own advice, right?

They say you aren't someone in fandom until you're plaigarised.

I'm not sure if I'm someone now or not... since I've recently been accused of plaigarising.... myself. That's right. MYSELF! ARGH, fuckwit.

Moving right along from that frustrating situation... My life is gone. As in... I've had 2 hours of sleep in the past two nights and the reason for this is all why_me_why_not's fault. She recently rec'd a WIP that was monaboyd. (listen to me dropping terms like I've been using them for forever)

Monaboyd= Dominic Monaghan/Billy Boyd. That's right, peeps, RPS. You may now start mocking me as I have mocked so many others for reading RPS. I've been reading it almost straight except for breaks for things like the toilet, that 2 hours of sleep, writing my hd_365 and driving to and from work. (Notice I didn't mention eating breaks cause I haven't really eaten in two days either) Expect a rec list soon.

How's everyone else? Anyone excited about Lumos? Just think... this time next week, wildegirl_05 and I will be either watching strippers, getting shitfaced, sitting by a pool or some other such activity. Everyone is welcome to join us, of course.

Still haven't sorted out the sleeping thing yet as wildegirl_05 has been sucked into her own RPS world. *pokes*

If you want to meet up with me at Lumos, comment here and I'll give you my mobile in a screened comment or you can email me or whatevah. If you want to stalk me, please to be making sure that you're Dominic Monaghan first, otherwise, I already have more than enough stalkers.