Emo

[wook77]

I'm just going to be overly emotional here so, err, I flocked this but...

omg. Seriously. I love you guys so very very much there is just no way I can express it sufficiently.

You know how they say that when you're life sucks the most there is always a bright light somewhere? I didn't really believe it, I have to admit. However, I totally have gotten that today from you all.



I, um, am having a complete meltdown in my life. I've recently "broken up" with my best friend. It was an awful way for the friendship to end and it is going to leave quite a few scars.

I've also been working approximately 60 hours a week and my boss is an asshat and my coworker is lazy so I'm basically doing shitloads of work that isn't mine to be doing and they're taking advantage.

I found out that I can't go to Grad School in San Francisco like I wanted because the tuition is too much money and I wouldn't be able to afford it.

Then, the new person that they're hiring to take over for the vacation twat is two levels below me, part time and doesn't require a skill set and is making a buck an hour less than me which is just a slap in the face as far as I'm concerned.

Then, today, I fell down the stairs outside of my office. Any other day I could have laughed it off but, today, it was the final straw. I just sat on those steps and sobbed so hard that I gagged. I finally hit that point where I couldn't say, it will get better. It has too.

Then, I come back to my desk and check in and someone wrote me a gift fic. My first gift fic ever. And it was so nice and well done and beautifully fluffy. So, I started crying again. Because I'm an overly emotional twat. It's based on my now favorite het pairing of EmoGoth!Colin/Bubbly!Parvati at vu_network and it's seriously amazing. It's If You Like Reading Colati" and it's fluffy and w00bie and just gorgeous. Who wouldn't fall in love with this guy?

Then, my afternoon crapped out on me again. Once more, I'm thinking, I've hit rock bottom. Then, I finally head over to that Fandom Love thing and cruise to see who I can leave a comment on since I fangirl so many people and OMG I'm IN THERE AND THERE'S A BUNCH OF COMMENTS AND THEY'RE ALL SO LOVELY and I started crying again. But it was a good crying.


So you all, thank you so much for brightening a craptacular month for me. I'm sorry that I've been cranky and ranty and complaining and whinging. I've been a horrible friend and I haven't been commenting like I wanted and I've been avoiding everyone on the messengers and everything.

Comments

[fiona-fawkes.livejournal.com]

*crushes wook in a great big giant loving hug*

So, the bright light is you computer monitor, then. Score.

[lurkitty.livejournal.com]

*hugs*

[corvidae9.livejournal.com]

*glomps like crazy* I'm so sorry to hear that you've been having such a rough time, sweetie. :( And there's a good reason people are saying such wonderful things about you. Tons, even.

And! Aberforth still loves you though, no matter what the goat thinks. In fact, he dedicated this song to you and asked me to pass it along so the goat doesn't get suspicious.

Give us a shout if there's anything else at all I can do. :D Even if it's just chattage or whatnot. <3

[yodels.livejournal.com]

All that, and you still managed to play song titles with us all day? You are amazing.

*smooshes you like crazy*

[jehnt.livejournal.com]

*tackles Wook* No more sadness! I demand it!

I'm really sorry you and your best friend are no longer BFFs. That is always the absolute worst. I've never had a breakup with a boyfriend that was even remotely as painful as a schism in best-friendship.

And, gah, I can't imagine working the amount of time you do. That's crazy. But at least they're hiring someone, so that should mean less work for you, right?

And I haven't been over at the Fandom Love thing because, uh, timesucker even more than the flist, I would guess, but who WOULDN'T have nice things to say about you? You're so awesome and nice and talented and stuff. I'm very bad at compliment-things so you should take that and run with it, lol.

[wearethestars.livejournal.com]

It's all about the LOVE baby!

[kaalee.livejournal.com]

We seem to be living somewhat parallel lives. Not completely the same, but enough similarities that I feel a very deep empathy for what you're going through and the things that you described feeling really resonated with me. Because of that... I'm so sorry. I really dislike the *over-wroughtness* that I've been feeling recently, and don't wish it on anyone.

And, because sometimes the boys say things better than I can... for you.

[incapricious.livejournal.com]

*hugs*

You don't need to apologize... you so have not been a horrible friend. We've both been not commenting and avoiding everyone on IM I think but I have to believe that doesn't make one a bad friend, it just makes one feel less connected to online friends, which can feel icky. But, dealing with your own RL stuff just has to happen and I'm sorry it's all been bad stuff and not good stuff. The thing with your friend has been a long time coming, but I'm sorry it's ended messily. I've never really had that happen, mostly due to not having friends (I don't mean for that to sound pathetic), or maybe due to my friendships all ending with a whimper and not a bang.

Seriously, despite your crappy month you still managed to brighten my day yesterday... which is amazing and you are wonderful and I wish I could do something to help you out, but I am just barely hanging on myself, to be honest. Repression only works for so long, apparently, and then it all bubbles over and you end up crying in the car (or at the bottom of some steps that really should fuck off for making you trip down them). If I lived near you we could go on a walk (at night when it is cooler) and look at the stars and we would end up somewhere in the middle of nowhere and we could both stand there and shout obscenities at cacti. And then we would go to my house and watch movies and drink tea with lots of honey. And then you would spend the night in our guest room and in the morning I would make waffles. *nods* That's what would happen.

♥

[dove95.livejournal.com]

We fangirls have to stick together. I'm sorry today seemed like a bust, but we're all here in someway for ya *hug*

[yaycoffee.livejournal.com]

Oh, man! My best friend (since we were twelve) broke up for about six months two years ago... so we would have been 27 at the time. It was messy and awful, and ... That is, seriously, one of the WORST things anyone can go through... way worse than breaking up with a boyfriend, IMHO. So, yeah--so much love on that. Guh.

And... funny you should mention goth!Collin. A RL friend sent this picture of the actor who plays Collin in the movies to me today, and it made me laugh. You've probably already seen it, though.

[bouncy.livejournal.com]

I have yet to comment on that meme but I saw yours on mine and thank you. <3 <3 <3 I'll be going through it tonight, expect one from me on yours.

As to the rest of this post, I really hope everything in your life gets sorted out and runs smoothly. Its such a horror when things just wont go right.

You don't need to apologise for anything. Life gets like this and we all react in our own ways. You have many, many friends that love you no matter how you are feeling and want to help you. ♥ ♥; ♥

[snottygrrl.livejournal.com]

[*pets*]

[*passes tea and chocolates*]

it must be something in the stars. life is less than happy for many i know.

[*pets again*]

[best-of-five.livejournal.com]

*sqmuishy hugs*

i hope it starts getting better soon ♥

[enchanted-jae.livejournal.com]

Aw, sweetie! I didn't know you were having such a rough time of it! *hugs you madly* Now I am sorry to have missed the Fandom Love for you, but I would have left a comment about how awesome and adorable and talented and wonderful you are! Even if your taste in hockey teams sucks. And why did you never tell me you hadn't received a gift fic before?! I would most certainly write you one! Give me an H/D prompt, hon, and I'll whip you up something this weekend, okay?