These things do not go together

[wook77]

Yanno, I did this entry of what makes me hit the backbutton really, really fast when it comes to fanfic. I feel like I should do one on professionally published works, as well. For example, referring to one of your main protagonists as "a slice of chocolate cake" because he's a black man. Really? Was that necessary and/or appropriate? The book sounded awful anyway (plus, no excerpt) but that "slice of chocolate cake" was just the icing on the fail cake (yes, bad pun, sorry :().

Interviewing continues for the open position. Recent applicants/interviewees included:

a.) the man telling me that he doesn't waste his time on "that Star Wars crap" (um, dude? You're staring at a picture of Wedge Antilles and you're sitting in an office currently filled with "that Star Wars crap"). He's much smarter than that because he likes chess but only plays against people that have a lower skill level than he does because he hates to lose. He also told us his previous boss was out to get him and constantly setting him up for failure and that he likes to snoop through other people's desks so that he can see what they are and aren't doing.

b.) the lady with the see-through shirt where I could see her bra. No thanks, I really do not need to see that. Plus, she then admitted that her animals are not fixed, that they run around the neighborhood adding to a pet overpopulation problem and then giggling about it. You do know what we do here, right?

c.) The lady who called me up and demanded an interview and then cried on the phone when I told her that she wasn't qualified. Please don't cry. That really makes me uncomfortable. I'm sorry that your years of working on building calculators doesn't qualify you for an accounting position but building them and using them are not the same thing.

d.) The guy who wants to be a wilderness guide, knows how to ride horses in two different styles and just got certified for remote wilderness survival. None of that relates to accounting. Just because you know which bugs to eat (yes, that was on his resume) doesn't mean that you'll be able to accurately determine which accounts to charge expenses to.

Ugh. Hiring. I keep hearing that there are tons of people looking for jobs. Why can't I get qualified AND non-crazy ones. They're either not-crazy and not-qualified or qualified and crazy.

So, interviewing continues, obviously.

Comments

[cornmouse.livejournal.com]

:O I had a similar conversation (re: book descriptions) yesterday with a friend when we were browsing the $1.00 racks at the used book store. Only, instead of chocolate cake, the descriptor that sent us over the PC deep end was "burnt mocha" skin. What does a burnt mocha even LOOK like???? IDEK.

I ended up picking up a Harlequin version of What Women Want for $0.50. LOL I just finished it and gods, it's really really bad. Like, not even the good kind of bad. Only the kind of bad that makes me hate my gender, or, not so much my gender as the women writing this drivel. Oi~

Hope you're doing well!
♥

[wook77.livejournal.com]

I just don't get it. The way that the "slice of chocolate cake" thing in there could've been fairly tongue-in-cheek but, instead, it was just squidgy. Burnt mocha looks gross, I'm quite certain. And it smells worse. Who wants burnt coffee?

Oh man. Those are the absolute worst. Like - when it's not badfic but Actual Awful Fic. BLARGH

I'm doing better, thanks! I'm still cleaning stuff up and fixing things so my sister doesn't have to so that's a little bit awful. But doing well, other than that.

<3<3<3

I love that icon, by the way. The car in the background really makes it.

[secretsolitaire.livejournal.com]

Wow, sounds like a bunch of winners...!

[wook77.livejournal.com]

Oh yeah. They're all fairly awesome. I've had to go through a pile of over 100 resumes and they're all just ridiculously unqualified.

Who puts "I excel at making coffee and baking cinnamon rolls. Baking requires a firm attention to detail, including exact measurements, which I think translates to accounting." Um, wut.

[karaz.livejournal.com]

I don't even understand how something like that got published. Wait. Nevermind.

Woah, with that first guy I would have been looking for candid camera. Sounds like someone wants to make sure you don't hire him.

[wook77.livejournal.com]

Well, it was an e-book from a rather infamous publisher.

I seriously thought he was trolling but it turns out that he was for really realz srs on me. He also told me he would have the CFO position within a year and be my boss because "that's how it always works with [him]". Ego much?

I hate interviewing. Like really really hate it.

[novembersnow.livejournal.com]

Wow. Your pool of applicants totally beats my recent pet peeve of people with grammatical errors on their resumes applying for writing/editing jobs. ;)

[djin7.livejournal.com]

I once got a resume that stated what the hopeful person's "colour" was, under her Bio. She'd been assessed via some online test as an "Orange" which, apparently, made her perfect for the job.

:/

Also, I think Wilderness Guy is the one. Ultimately, accounting will drive him around the bend and straight up Crazy River, where he will live, knowing which plants and bugs can sustain him! Win/win!

[enchanted-jae.livejournal.com]

The mind boggles.

[sugareey.livejournal.com]

...the fuck? D:

And you would think one of the qualifications would be experience with accounting or book-keeping. Maybe a degree in that. *head desk*