wook77 | Day 3 - Thoughts on Exchange Sign-Ups

Day 3 of NaBloPoMo. I found about 8billion thinkythought posts on an external harddrive and, thus, am now posting them to keep this baby going.

Exchange Sign-Ups – Fandom's version of Mongolian BBQ

I'll admit it, I'm one of the crazy-assed bitches that give WAY too much information in a sign-up for an exchange. I'll list out fifty kinks, twenty desired scenarios and about 50 squicks so I'm rather biased in my interpretation of how exchange sign-ups should work.

There's a reason for my level of detail. I don't trust anyone (see above crazy-assed bitch comment). I don't trust you, my assigned prompt fulfiller, to know that clones, baby oil and the phrase "dripping folds" are major squicks for me without me telling you. Why don't I trust you? Because I don't trust the mods to assign my BFFs to write for me and, thus, you're probably a stranger/acquaintance. Why don't I trust the mods? Because it's not their job to only assign my BFFs to write for me. Their job is to make matches based on about a billion things and hope that something inspires.

So I figure, from the get-go, that someone that I don't know is going to be writing/drawing for me. I assume, from the minute I start to sign-up for an exchange, that you know only what is on that sign-up, that you aren't going to do any further research, and I fill it out accordingly. I give loads of kinks, lots of scenarios that will make me happy and tons of things that send me running for the hills. That way, you'll know, going into it, what I like and don't like. I make certain that there are both art-friendly and fic-friendly kinks and scenarios because I love and adore receiving art.

(side note from the main point, if you say you don't mind receiving art, throw the artists a bone and give them something to work with, plzkthx. I can only imagine how hard it has to be to only see fic-related prompts/requests and tweak that to art.)

I've seen a lot of people freak out when they get an assignment with a lot of detail. I know that people get stressed out thinking that they have to include everything listed under the kinks/scenarios. The answer to this possibility is hell fucking no. You are under no obligation to include everything under the kinks. Anyone that gives fifty kinks and expects you to include every one of them is a demanding jerk that should never be allowed to sign up for another exchange ever. You are, however, under every obligation to ensure that you don't include a thing off the squicks list.

Treat the list like a Mongolian BBQ. You're greeted with all sorts of stuff to put in your food. Feeling inspired to have chicken, broccoli, carrots and teriyaki sauce? Sweet, it just so happens that this menu offers you chicken, broccoli, carrots and teriyaki sauce! Oh, wait, the person doesn't like carrots. So you can still do chicken, broccoli and teriyaki!

And maybe pork is your favorite thing in the world and I don't list it as something I like. Well, do you like beef? What an awesome coincidence, there it is on my menu! Or, hey, I don't like meat at all… but we both love veggies! w00t! Vegetarian entrees for everyone! Slap that shit on the grill and let's get cooking!

Meaning, if my sign-up says that I like: tattoos, kissing, flangst, angst and canon characterizations, you can write that canon-compliant fic with kissing. There's no need to include and I, as the recipient, should have no expectations that you will include, tattoos, flangst and angst. You can pick and choose from the menu I've provided you. The more detailed the menu, the more opportunity you, the prompt fulfiller, has to create a bowl of yumminess that I'm sure to enjoy.

IMHO, the worst assignments to get are ones that look like the following (note: not assignments I've received but they're close representations):

Kinks:
Squicks: necro, non-con, scat

There was one sign-up that I got that, including pairings, was 9 words long. Nine. Three pairings takes it to 3 words to describe kinks, squicks and desired scenarios. How the hell can I find out what you like so I can create something that will make you happy when that area is blank!? I can't. I'm doomed, from the beginning, to create what I like and disregard what you might or might not have hoped to receive.

With the above sign-up, you're begging for genderbending gangbang and cumshots with bonus felching, rimming, voyeurism and infidelity whether that's what you wanted or not.

The only "the whole detailed list must be obeyed" that I have is about squicks. That list is sacrosanct, IMHO. If I tell you that I abhor baby oil, felching, rimming and dub-con, do not, under any circumstances, write them. They're squicks for a reason.

To go back to the food analogy, you have no way of knowing if I'm allergic to seafood or that I just don't like it. All you know is that I have seafood listed in my Do-Not-Want list. Therefore, don't include it. You might just kill me when I go into anaphylactic shock. Or you might just disgust me with the way that the eyeballs seem to stare up at me in betrayal. Either way, you're risking an extremely negative reaction to your creation. Why would any reasonable person do that? (that's a rhetorical question, I know why they would.)

So take that list of kinks and desired scenarios and treat it like a menu that you can choose to glut yourself on (woohoo, fifteen of my fifty prompts! It's a giant bowl of yummy!) or pick at sparingly (woohoo, tattoos! omnomnom sooooo good). It's your choice how much you choose to use. Don't look at detailed sign-ups as stress and crazy. Look at them as plenty of options so you can satisfy yourself AND your recipient at the Mongolian BBQ with a tasty dish that's sure to satisfy if not delight and amaze.